Roadtripping through the Winter Wonderland to Crazy Town

Driving through the Midwest this past week I was treated to the wonders of our radio universe and when I stopped I got to watch television, which I never do at home. Wow! is all I can say.

First the good spots. I watched Cleveland Indian baseball--actually full games--on television with snow falling outside. Of course, the games were from 2001 but still I got to see Roberto Alomar and others who are long gone. The second suprise was an oldie station out of Pittsburgh called "Where Have They Gone?", which played singles from 1954 and 1955 only. It was great--I have never heard any of these songs before. Like The Diablos singing "Rain".

The History Channel has decided to go all religion on us with documentaries on the undiscovered manuscripts of Nostradamus, predicting the apocalypse in 2012, and various religions commenting on the nature of Satan. I was glad Rev. Hagee of Christians for Israel seemed more interested in talking about weight-loss on his show. The Christian network showed midwestern evangelists warning against idolatry, horoscopes, magic, witchcraft and other stumbling blocks to faith. They also had a Christian nature show that focused on the wonders of Creation and viewas of planet earth--possible candidates for climate change legislation. There was a talk show on Christian financial management and debt consolidation. An old-time preacher talked about the hierachy of sins--with adultery,sodomy, and out of marriage sex forming the first tier and down on tier 4 was murder and robbery. Hmm.

I learned from Glenn Beck that progressives started their coup against America with Woodrow Wilson and that FDR only made some of the decisions he did because he had melanoma. That progressives taught the Nazis about the Big Lie and that it was their ideas on eugenics that led to death camps. I also watched a tape of an evangelical preacher lecturing Ugandans that gays were wicked and evil with hearts of stone; that gays were serial killers and mass murders and were the guards at Nazi death camps and were responsible for the Rwanda genocide. I think he should hook up with Glenn Beck, who also has tax problems.

I learned from a black station broadcasting out of Cleveland that floride in the water will cause kidney problems and that you should not vaccinate your child because it's a government plot to make you dependent on drugs that will be needed to cure the diseases that the vaccines create.

I heard that Michael Steele the Hip-Hop Republican was chosen by God to head the RNC and he was having a hard time because he held town hall meetings at Howard University and in Harlem. I heard him say that the Republicans would not win back the House and that Republicans were not ready to govern again. I also heard Newt Gingrich come to his defense saying he went to seminary and is African-American and that's why the Republicans are hard on him. In other words, the GOP hates Catholics and Blacks. I also heard Republicans whisper that the RNC is down to $9 million at a time they feel things are looking up for them. I heard Mchael Steele published a book on a 12-step Program to Fight Obama's Agenda where he argues that Republicans have to admit that everything after Ronald Reagan was a mistake.

I also heard Rudy "Noun-A Verb-911" Guiliani say there were no terrorist attacks on America under George W. Bush. I also heard Dana Perino, Bush's White House spokesman, and Mary Matalin say the same thing. Maybe it's all true and we should forget.

I listened to right-wing radio shows. I thought I heard Rush Limbaugh mention that the problem with our health care system is that everyone who is born in the United States believes they are special and that they are entitled to all sorts of care from cradle to the grave, even treatments at the final stages of life. I guess he's for death panels. I heard Mike Gallagher claim there was a fifty year plot, the end of which Obama is implementing, to take away all our freedoms. Callers in argued that the problem was the Federal Reserve and that the Founding Fathers were against national banks of this sort. Another caller-in claimed he was a progressive who voted twice for Ronald Reagan and voted for Obama but was disappointed because he hasn't created any jobs. Another called in to say that Obama was too immature for the job and didn't know what he was doing. Still others called to say that Obama doesn't believe in terrorism and that we should torture all detainees and not try them. But others blame the GOP for having such a weak candidate in John McCain and that only a real conservative would win.

I also watched C-Span. First, I sat through a full White House press conference where poor Gibbs had to evade discussions about the 2010 elections, maintaining that there are 11 months away and that's a lifetime. Next, I watched a masterful performance by Arnold Schwartzenegger to the California Legislature. When your house is burning down and an avalanche is heading to you and a tsunami is about to hit, he's the guy you want for a pep talk. Even though California is bankrupt and collapsing, he managed to convince the viewer that it was the greatest place on the planet and you should move there. Following this was an academic conference on the future economic development of North Korea and all the investment opportunities that will be opening up. A Stanford Professor mentioned how Bechtel can't wait to get involved. And my C-Span viewing ended with a New America Foundation forum on Agent Orange and how all the Vietnamese are becoming genetic mutants because of their exposure to it and our veterans are developing parkinson's disease because of it but the VA won't treat them.

I caught CNN's Cooper lying about Bernie Sanders' $10 billion amendment to the health care bill. It's not for Vermont alone--you could buy the state for that. It's for free health clinics in 50 states. That's what Senators are supposed to do. Cooper claimed he was paid off for his vote. I guess that would do it--you accept a major social program, I'll vote for it.

I learned Bill Clinton was playing hide-the-salami during the last campaign when his wife was running. I learned that Elizabeth Edwards was a witch in person. I learned that Sarah Palin had to be taught the reasons there was a North and a South Korea and what the Fedral Reserve does before her interview with Charles Gibson. I learned that Sarah Palin thought Senator Joe Biden was Senator O'Biden and I learned she lied about her husband's membership in the Alaska Independence Party, which lasted seven years.

I did learn from John Tesh that mustard kills e-coli and that every American this year will have a case of food sickness.

Now can you imagine keeping all of that in your head? We are driving ourselves mad. There is no way one can assimilate all this nonsense and remain sane. Then, the question becomes does anyone in this country actually believe any of this? Does news, which now is entertainment, matter? Or is this all electronic wallpaper?

And I leave this post with the most terrifying thing I learned: The number 2 donor to the Democratic National Committee is Fox News--yes Newscorp.