Back Up After Internet Loss--Thoughts from Agnes Martin

22 Verizon people and a repairman later, my internet was restored. Too bad Google doesn't have human beings answering their calls because my gmail is still out. Contrary to all the tech support that called the Modem out of date and the lines still in service, the problem turned out to be a corroding phone line across the street. 

Since my last post, the Senate filibustered background checks despite 90% of the public supporting them,we got bombed in Boston by two Chechens, the Senate unveiled an immigration reform bill, which promptly ran into the xenophobia caused by the Boston bombing,the Senate promptly passed a bill to end sequestration on air traffic controllers so they could recess on time.The President showed up on West, Texas to mourn and attended the opening of the W library in Dallas. President Obama hit them out of the part with his jokes at the White House Correspondents Dinner . Kevin Spacey appeared with celebrity walk-ons for a parody and Steven Spielberg unveiled the promo for his new film "Obama". More importantly Mariano Rivera has nine saves for the Yankees and Rafael Soriano has five for the Nationals. Bryce Harper has 9 homers. 

So what did I learn from my internet silence? My wife and I had to listen to the radio narrative of the capture of "the young man in the Boat" on Franklin Street in Watertown, Mass. It was like listening to old radio shows. I also learned that there is a lot of say about being unconnected. I have read less insane comments from Congresscritters and as a result smoke much less. It is true that international events have taken a turn for the worse. But what are you going to do about it. I could compensate somewhat by buying the daily papers.  I was spared the flood of Obama-hating e-mails and the pathetic defense of firearms. Yes, by the end of May, our gun deaths in the United States since Newtown will reach the level of American deaths in the whole Iraq War. And, of course, I read a lot, which I will share in the next day or two. Try it sometime. Turn off your cellphones. Turn off the internet. Don't read e-mails. You will be calmer and more focused.

My mother-in-law ,hearing of my plight, said it would only get worse. We have created elaborate systems that can't be fixed by human beings and we are prisoners of them.

Between the new books, I am re-reading texts about the artist Agnes Martin. Speaking of her art and life project, she wrote in the "Untroubled Mind":

"When I was painting in New York I was not so clear about that
Now I am very clear that the object is freedom
not political freedom,which is the echo
not freedom from social mores
freedom from mastery and slavery
freedom from what's dragging you down
freedom from right and wrong...
When you give up the idea of right and wrong
you don't get anything
What you do is get rid of everything."

In her "What is Real?", she writes:
"Now we must consider the idea of Power because without freedom we can not make our full response. With the idea of power in our minds we are subject to that power. If you believe in it, then it exists for you and you are naturally subject to it. But in reality there is no power anywhere."

"The most troublesome anti-freedom concept is our belief in a transcendent supreme authority. It is a recognition of our state of obedience that makes us postulate this authority. But when we see that all authority there is, is within ourselves as a result of our obedience then we are free. It is the only road to freedom."

Agnes Martin can sometimes read like a Zen koan. Take for instance the following:

"As it was in the beginning,there was no division
and no separation
Don't look at the stars
Then your Mind goes freely--way,way beyond
Look between the rain
the drops are insular."

In "What We Don Not See if We Do Not See", she writes:
In nature there is no sameness anywhere. There are no two rocks alike, no days alike, no moments alike even forever.
And no two people alike or any moment of their lives.

Reading these it is no wonder I was driven to The Gary Snyder Reader.  Off line,off politics. It has been therapeutic.